Listen to this Epilogue:
On October 23, I sent an email to several people in my Outlook Contacts with links to the video clips on the sites, “No on Prop 8” and “Adventists Against Prop 8,” with the simple message: “And what does the LORD require of you but to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?” (Micah 6:8). (Prop 8 was a California ballot proposition and a state constitutional amendment intended to ban same-sex marriage; it passed in the November 2008 California state elections and was later overturned in court on June 26, 2013.)
Here’s a response from a man who had told Lina, to her face, that he thinks she should stop being partnered in order to continue serving at SF Central. Oh, and he has a gay son.
~~~~~
On October 24, he sent me this email:
“The Lord also says to go and sin no more, so this thing is a huge mess—the whole church has become feminized, with men unable to stand for right, and it will open the door for the church to accept same-sex marriage as being the norm—which it isn’t. How can you talk yourself into this one, Juliana? This isn’t about religious freedom; it’s about gay marriage being accepted by us all.
Kerry”
~~~~~
My reply:
“Go and sin no more” was actually said by Jesus to a straight woman, a prostitute, whose sin was promiscuity. It was not said to someone in a lifetime monogamous relationship.
Your statement, “…the whole church has become feminized…” sounds like you think there is something wrong with being feminine. Are you implying that women do not or cannot “stand for right”? Sorry, but that sounds like sexism to me!
No, Kerry, there is nothing in Prop 8 that says that anyone has to accept gay marriage! Prop 8 eliminates the right of same-sex couples to marry. It will not affect schools, churches, or any other institution, in spite of the lies you are hearing on the TV ads promoting passage of Prop 8. Churches will NOT be forced to marry same-sex couples; that is a lie! The only organizations required to extend equal rights to gays are those organizations who are funded by government money. That is exactly why Adventist institutions should not accept government funding!
Regardless of how you feel about homosexuality (including your own son), it is never right to discriminate against any segment of the population.
Kerry, have you read Christianity and Homosexuality: Some Seventh-day Adventist Perspectives (the book I gave to Carol)? If not, I would strongly recommend that you do so. It looks at both sides of the issue.
I am praying for you and Carol and your relationship with your son.
~~~~~
His next response:
“No matter what books I read for or against homosexuality, I cannot accept it as normal behavior for myself—it goes against my gut feeling about what is right or wrong. When I go down to the Castro and see what happens there, I’m sickened, knowing that this is the lifestyle my son has chosen to live in.
“Two men or two women being affectionate with each other really riles me up; in fact, it sickens me, knowing that it could be my son.
“You can argue all you like, JH. It is not acceptable behavior for an Adventist Christian person, male or female; you can’t couple up and expect God to bless you in that relationship.
“I believe the only way to be gay and a Christian is to live a single life and not in a relationship; that’s the only way for me, and I’ve told my son that.
“But sadly, most kids when they come out are angry at the world and turn their everything against God, we have three gay boys in our immediate family and that’s what has happened—also a lot of people, for instance, the church people don’t know how to deal with it, and when they need friends the most, they feel abandoned.
“Yes, I’m a sexist—have been all my life—I see the role of males as leaders, of family, church, and state, and that’s the way I am.
“As for Prop 8—I don’t have a TV, so have had no brainwashing there—and don’t want to enter into CA politics—if I did, I’d be an Independent as this election is a sham—having a candidate who wasn’t born in this country and can’t produce a birth certificate. Crazy—only in America.”
[I really had to “hold my tongue” about his bashing of Obama!]~~~~~
My next reply:
Kerry, I do not intend to argue with you. Just making a few observations:
- I certainly *hope* you would not “accept [homosexuality] as normal behavior for [yourself]”! You are definitely heterosexual, and a sexist, to boot (by your own admission)!
- What “happens” in the Castro is not representative of the entire gay community.
- Homosexuality is not a “lifestyle”—it is an orientation. Vegetarianism is a lifestyle.
- Just because something “sickens” you does not mean it sickens God or that it is a sin.
- You have every right to your opinions, as you have expressed in your email. However, you do NOT have a right to not allow other people to have their opinions, too.
- You are correct that “the church people don’t know how to deal with [homosexuality].” That’s why Christianity and Homosexuality was written by the Adventist theologians, scholars, and health professionals who contributed to its writing. But, then, you wouldn’t know that if you have not read the book. I am sorry that the “good church people” continue to live in willful ignorance.
- Re: Proposition 8 and the elections. I am glad to hear that you are not being brainwashed by things on TV.
Kerry, I mean it—I will continue to pray for you and Carol, but even more so for your son and your other gay family members. They are God’s precious gay children, and He holds them close to His heart.
J.
Addendum: I did not know at the time that this would be the last “conversation” I would ever have with Kerry and that I would never see him again. Several months later, we learned that Kerry had passed away suddenly with stomach cancer.
Fortunately, his gay son in England found and connected with SDA Kinship.