Emotional Detox

Thursday, September 16, 2021, 10:00 a.m.

We had waited for five long weeks for Linda’s first consultation appointment at Stanford in Redwood City. Her orthopedist, Dr. Martin, whom her primary physician had referred her to, had referred Linda to Dr. Goodman at Stanford. Linda is good at following GPS instructions, and we found a good handicap parking space. Linda was able to find her place inside, and Emily and I had a nice walk outside. When we got back to the car, we needed to roll down the windows so I put my key in the ignition and the radio came on, too, to KDFC. Nice classical music. Emily was comfortable and I settled in to read my Kindle.

Later, at some point, I was vaguely aware that the radio wasn’t playing but I didn’t know why. Until Linda came back to the van and we were not able to operate the lift which relies on battery power. Linda suggested I start the van, but it wouldn’t start. Then reality hit us quickly—the battery was dead!

“Call Triple A,” Linda said. (Good thing I have a new phone!) It was also a good thing that I had just renewed our AAA subscription! I dug out my AAA card and dialed in the phone number. The call went to an automated system (of course!) but somehow I was able to navigate that until I had placed a request for assistance. Then the answer came back: “Your service technician has been dispatched and should arrive in approximately…75 minutes.” Yikes! It was 80 degrees and we had no air conditioning but at least the windows were down and we had water in the car.

We were amazingly calm, but we had no other choice but to wait. AAA was good at keeping us updated as to the progress of Ellison’s Towing Service, and the service technician actually arrived a few minutes early. We were both glad to see it was a man of color (Samoan, Linda thought) as they are usually more competent than white boys. He lifted the hood and could quickly see that the battery was badly corroded and needed to be replaced. He told us how much it would cost and seemed mildly surprised that we did not object. So he proceeded to remove the old battery and install a new one, then filled out the paperwork for me to sign. He even waited around for me to make sure the scooter lift worked properly and that I was able to get the scooter inside the van. He asked us to give him a five-star review that AAA would send to us, and we were more than happy to do that.

Monday, September 20, 2021

The first thing on my to-do list was to call Heally.com for the annual renewal of my medical cannabis card. $35. Not a big deal. My only concern was that I might not be able to connect with the audio or video, because I remembered there was some confusion about that last year. It had been considerably more difficult than it had been with HelloMD when I initially got the medical cannabis card in 2017. I didn’t know how much more difficult it was going to be this year!

I clicked through with the link Heally gave in their email and got a screen that indicated my wait time was 5 minutes. However, in small print, it said that if I didn’t have an appointment it might take “considerably longer.” Their email said nothing about needing an appointment! So I clicked on the Live Chat box and began a conversation with someone identified as AI or Al, I couldn’t tell which. Sure, “Artificial Intelligence”! However, it did seem to be a real person on the other side, but they were less than helpful. I had already put in my credit card information so I didn’t want to just log out and start over. I asked what I should do, and “AI” (or “Al”) said I should wait. So I waited. And waited. At least there wasn’t any annoying “elevator music” playing, so I got down my coloring sheet and colored.

After 45 minutes, I went back to the Live Chat Box. AI (or Al) had left the chat, but I started typing anyway. This time, someone identified as Ro came on. (Uh-huh. Robot.) I asked when they thought the doctor would be available. Their answer was “from 2 p.m.” I didn’t know what that meant, so I asked when I could get an appointment. After a few minutes, they said they had scheduled me for 2 p.m.

Shortly before 2 o’clock, my cell phone rang with a call from Dr. Cheryl B. She said I had to download an app in order to communicate with her and that I would receive a 6-digit confirmation code. Well, I didn’t know how I was going to get a text, write down the confirmation code, and then return to the cell phone call. I got the text, wrote down the confirmation code, and just started pressing buttons on the phone to try to get back to the phone call. It turns out, they did have that automated, and magically installed the app, and then I was on the phone call. I had to keep touching the phone every 10 seconds so it wouldn’t go dark while I was talking. But eventually I got through all her questions and instructions and she said I was approved for another year. (I had no doubt that I would be!)

But I had spent two hours on a procedure that I had thought would take 15 minutes, during which I saw that I got a call from David Hegarty.

David Hegarty

David did not leave a voice mail, so I called him back. He was in his car and in Stanford where he was going to practice the organ at the church that has employed him, has paid him for the entire time during the pandemic even though they were not having in-person services, but they were going to have their first in-person service next week. However, the more important news he had to tell me was that he had been invited to take part in a concert to celebrate the 50th anniversary of the Casavant pipe organ in the Kettering church. The concert would be next Saturday, September 25. He talked in detail about the other performers on the program and then what pieces he was planning to play and why. He didn’t know if it would be live-streamed or not, but he would let me know. We talked for 58 minutes.

While it felt good to have that in-depth conversation with David, I had consumed 3 hours of the time I had planned to do work for Arlene Taylor. And I needed to take a walk with Emily! So I decided to do that and re-schedule my work for Arlene for Thursday.

Tuesday, September 21, 2021, 4 p.m.

We had a routine but successful trip to Alameda Farmers’ Market, Trader Joe’s, and Safeway. But I had been up since 6 a.m. and I didn’t want to fall asleep during the online Pain Group, so I ate a dark chocolate bar with 75 mg. of caffeine and 10 grams of carbs.

The online Pain Group started out as usual, but then Julie Whitehead said she had an announcement that “would change things.” Of course, I imagined the worst, as I always do, and fully expected her to say that the online group was going to end. What she actually said was that she was moving to another position within the Kaiser system (she later described that as a “managerial position” in Oakland) and her last day with us would be the last Tuesday in October. This was just as I was thinking about making an appointment with her to discuss the possibility of getting a letter certifying that Emily was my Emotional Support Animal! She did say, rather parenthetically, that if we had any reason to contact her, she thought we could still do that through the Kaiser practitioner messaging system.

Jeannie

She is a Facebook friend who I also know in real life, although I don’t see her very often. I started doing her website pro bono in her early days before she developed the thriving foot care practice she has in Modesto. I love her dearly, but we are polar opposites politically. She occasionally gets on an anti-California, anti-San Francisco, anti-Governor Newsom rant which I struggle to ignore. This time, however, I decided to “snooze” her for 30 days. So I also will not see any of her posts about her business or her vacations. I will miss that. I will miss her, but I made that decision for my own mental health.

Wednesday, September 22, 2021, 1 p.m.

Linda was a little more unsure of this appointment at Stanford in Palo Alto with the anesthesiologist, particularly about the parking, because it appeared to have only a parking garage and what if we couldn’t get in because of the vertical clearance?!? But, fortunately, the clearance was 8′ 9″ and that was more than enough.

We finally found a handicap space that was not limited to two hours, and it was very close to an elevator. However, I didn’t have Emily’s Minnie Mouse stroller with us, so I took a blanket that was in the van and folded it up for her to lie on if we found an empty table. And we did. I didn’t have anything to give Emily water in, though, so I just hoped she wouldn’t get too thirsty before we were ready to go back home. Once I checked my phone for the temperature and it said 79 degrees. Emily enjoyed watching all the people walking around. Twice she saw someone walking their dog and she stood up and barked quietly.

Apparently, Linda’s appointment was successful, in that they decided she was “healthy” enough to have surgery. It was a long, hard day for Linda and she was in a lot of pain before we got home. She wasn’t sure she would be able to go up the five steps into the house, but she did.

Wednesday, September 22, 6:30 p.m.

We got home shortly after 5 p.m. so there was enough time to get supper and get on our weekly Zoom call with Alex. We love to talk with him and are constantly amazed at what he’s learning in school (Kindergarten).

At one point, Lisa came into the Zoom window and asked if we were going to be home on Saturday. Of course, my first thought was about David’s concert, which is 5 p.m. in Ohio and 2 p.m. in California, if it’s going to be live-streamed, which we don’t know yet. But we told Lisa about it and she suggested that they come early as she needs to go to her bank in Alameda again.

John McLarty

The other thought, which I did not mention, was that the Adventist Today Sabbath Seminar (at 10:30 a.m. to 2 p.m. on Saturday) is scheduled to have John McLarty as presenter this week. I had been quite delighted when Loren announced that, as John was supposed to have been on the panel for the September 11 presentation but didn’t show up (no reason was given).

Now I have to backtrack and give some background about John McLarty and why I know the Universe is conspiring to keep him out of my life.

1. Kinship Kampmeeting in Portland, July 2019. Reggie asked me if I would introduce John McLarty before his presentation. (Full backstory is given in my “Jacquie’s Journal” blog post at https://jacquiesjournal.wordpress.com/2019/07/11/john-mclarty-at-kampmeeting-2019/.) The short story is that someone else introduced John and no one told me or asked me! It essentially ruined all of 2019 Kampmeeting for me. The only positive encounter that I remembered was meeting Randi Robertson (a very sweet, delightful transwoman) in person.
2. Summer 2020, mid-pandemic (or what we hoped would be the middle of it). I discovered Green Lake Church (in Washington state) where John McLarty was the pastor, so I started watching every week. The church service was very traditional, with good organ music and great hymns, but with a very non-traditional message of inclusion and affirmation of women, children, and all ethnic groups. It very quickly became the highlight of my Sabbaths!  Then at the end of that year, he announced his retirement, and December 26 was his last Sabbath. That was the last time I watched Green Lake Church service (except for last Sabbath, September 18, which was live-streamed with pre-recorded portions because the entire church was at a church retreat).
3. September 11 (as mentioned above). Disappointed that John McLarty was not part of the presentation as scheduled.
4. September 25 (the final blow). I will not get to hear John McLarty’s presentation in real time. Yes, I know, his presentation will be recorded and posted on the Adventist Today Facebook page. But it’s just not the same as hearing and seeing it in real time.

Therefore, I very painfully removed everything from my life. Unfollowed and unfriended John McLarty and Loren Seibold. I “unliked” the Adventist Today Facebook page. Yes, I know it wasn’t their fault! Just like I know it wasn’t Todd Leonard’s fault that I lost Glendale City Church as a web client in 2016, when I unfriended Todd and all the GGC members that I had become Facebook friends with. It would just be too painful to continue to see their posts and to be part of the community.

It’s a emotional detox that I desperately need!

Emily and I took our usual walk to the duck pond but it was too hot to sit outside, so we went inside and found my favorite chair by the window where we can look outside and see the fountain in the pond.