November 19, 2018, 4:00 p.m.
Linda and Emily and I had enough time at Olive Garden to enjoy a leisurely lunch and drinks. We stayed as long as we felt it was appropriate, and we still arrived back at Union City Kaiser an hour an a half before my physical therapy appointment. Linda left the radio on to lovely music from KDFC as she (would tell me later) practiced mindful breathing in time with the music. The three of us slept. But I did wake up in time to go in.
Francis was 15 minutes late for my appointment. He was profusely apologetic, explaining that he was on a necessary phone call. I didn’t mind that. I’m just so paranoid that I always think he has forgotten about my appointment whenever that happens.
I was unusually thirsty and kept my water bottle handy. (This may have been due to the Rosato I had with lunch at Olive Garden.) We talked in the beginning, as usual, and when he asked how I was doing, I said, “Better than I was last time.” Though I think he could tell.
“Why do you think that is?” he asked. (I still think he should be a combination of physical therapist and counselor!)
I shrugged. Then I told him about my November Gratitudes project, of posting one thing that I’m thankful for every day in November. He nodded.
“I decided to focus on gratitude this month, then on forgiveness for next month, December.”
He smiled. “Gratitude and forgiveness are two very important strategies in pain management.” It wasn’t the first time that he, as well as Dr. Whitehead in the Pain Management Program, had said this.
I felt like it was making excuses to say that I hadn’t been walking because of all the smoke in the air. But I said it anyway.
“So how did you get your walking in?” he asked.
“I didn’t!” Now I really felt guilty. “But,” I interjected, “I did do my (physical therapy) exercises every day.”
“Good!”
I didn’t talk about pain medications at all today. I didn’t need to; he had my medical record at his fingertips on his computer screen. I did confirm I’m “still eating keto” (which I do every time) and keeping my blood sugars under control. He always smiles when I tell him that. I wonder if he has other patients who are also diabetic and eating low-carb.
He checked my progress by having me turn my head in different directions. He then had me keep my head straight while turning only my eyes, following his finger, from the center to one side then then other. He seemed as pleased with me as I have been feeling about myself.
When he sat down to schedule my next appointment, I stepped out in faith and said, “I think I would like to try skipping a month and having the next appointment in January.” He continued to look at his schedule. “I think I still need the accountability of having an appointment, but maybe I won’t need them as often.”
I imagined that he seemed relieved but he didn’t say anything other than, “Well, how about January 11? Four o’clock?”
“I could come earlier if you have a time available.” I really have hated coming late in the day, especially the last appointment of the day. Feeling as it I’m the least important patient!
“Okay, three o’clock, then?”
“Perfect!”
It was dark when I left the building and I felt guilty because my own appointment had gone longer than an hour. (But maybe that’s the perk of having the last afternoon appointment!) But Linda and Emily were fine. That’s when Linda told me about her mindful breathing with the music on KDFC.
“I have had the most relaxed afternoon!” she told me. “It was lovely!”
Indeed, it was.