“Sounds”
By Pauline Wendy Phillips
My younger son, Jon (Jonathan), adopted by his stepfather, and whom I hadn’t seen in 30 years since he was 8 years old, who was on business at a trade show in Kansas City for Shopsmith, rented a car there, and drove around 150 miles to Centralia, Missouri, to visit me today!
He had called Saturday night after I was in bed to work out the details. He called again Sunday to say his plans were still on. Then called earlier today saying he was leaving Columbia.
We had a delightful visit. He said his original plan for some time had been to have both he and my elder son, Tim (Timothy), visit me, but that it had never worked out geographically. And that he would tell Tim he has visited me.
I told him why I was not allowed to see him or Tim. Because my ex had consulted a psychiatrist who said they needed a father figure, and that I, a female intersexual, shouldn’t be allowed to see them anymore.
Then he invited to take me out to dinner rather than me having to prepare lunch for him. I didn’t know the best place to go. So we checked out several places in town and ended up in Pizza Hut. He treated me like a lady by holding the doors for me, paying the bill, and unlocking the right-side car door and opening it for me.
Later, he drove back to catch his plane to Idaho.
For several years, I thought Jon had rejected me after he quit writing me. But he said he was busy with his new business. And all he really needed to want to visit me was time to both accept me as I am and see me that way. He commented that must be the reason he failed to contact me when I lived in Pasadena, California, after he became an adult. For he admitted he had felt lost for several years after he was no longer allowed to see me—because we had been so close.
I’m very proud of Jon. For a son who was adopted against my will to spend so much money and time on me when he doesn’t profess to be religious means a very great deal to me!
As a small boy, he went into the bathroom and asked Jesus to come into his heart. I think He did! To make room in his heart for Jesus, he thought he had to get rid of something inside. He had the right idea in principle.
So I’d say whether G, L, B, T, or I, who want acceptance by someone, don’t give up or lose hope, but be patient and pray! We didn’t discuss any gay or lesbian issues specifically because he didn’t ask. Other than asking how I became acquainted with and friends with Sara, whose pic he saw. He referred to my intersexual role change as a choice, but I chose not to say more about it.
Remember, that for many people to accept a transsexual or an intersexual who changes from the sex-gender role assigned at birth is harder than accepting someone who’s “merely” GLB! Even some GLBs seem to have a problem with it.
Copyright 1996, 1998, 1999 by Wendy Phillips
Pauline Wendy Phillips was an intersex Seventh-day Adventist who was living in the Midwest at the time of writing this story.